The Mama's Boy Curse

What is a mama's boy?

The absence of a psychological and emotional connection between father and son or the father is not present is why many boys become mama's boys. 

Being a mama's boy is thought of as an adorable way to say there is an unbreakable bond between a mother and her son. Mama's boys' have unquestioned support for their mothers, and their love is unconditional, and they assume the love is reciprocated. Often, this is the case unless there is a man involved that serves as a barrier between mother and son. Some mothers do an exceptional job managing their dating and marital life while also meeting the needs of their sons. 

However, many women, especially those who are broken, wounded, or insecure, fall into the trap of allowing damaged and deceitful men into their lives. These men create toxic environments that detrimentally impact the long-term relationship between mothers and their sons, which explains why being a mama's boy is not always good. Men often mistreat boys they do not have a bond with or are not their sons. These scenarios can put mothers in compromising positions where they are forced to choose between the man and the child. 

Women who are not mentally and emotionally healthy tend to choose their trauma and pain over their children; this tends to manifest itself as the selection of a man that reflects their deepest wounds, fears, and insecurities regarding love and attachment. When this happens, the son's life is a roller coaster, and he does not know if he is having fun or having motion sickness. Although his love is unwavering, his frustration grows at his mother's inconsistency between what she claims her son means to her yet continually allows him to be collateral damage in her adult intimate relationships. 

Eventually, the distractions or band-aids mothers use to patch their sons up after another inexcusable occurrence no longer suffices. One day the son finally will see her for what she is and realize the bond is not what he thought it to be. Their bond is not healthy and desperately needs to be broken. For years, the mother sucked the love, loyalty, and adoration she should have been getting from her lover out of her son. These mothers are not different from emotional vampires who establish one-sided relationships with great listeners that offer excellent advice. Like emotional vampires going AWOL when it is time to be a reciprocal friend, when it is time for mama to make a sacrifice and have her son's back, she will fail with flying colors. 

I write the blog for all the young men still hamsters in wheels, loving their mothers like they love Christ but suffer countless letdowns because of her decisions. You were not born to be a sacrificial lamb for a woman who refuses to prioritize your physical, psychological, and emotional well-being over her dysfunction and needs to be loved by men she doesn't need. Nor were you born to take the abuse of an invalidating father, stepfather, or boyfriend that, regardless of what mama tells you, you know isn't right. Start the freeing process so that you can begin the healing process.